Back on track..

Being in my early twenties I have found out that it is hard to figure out who you are. Alot of your fears and insecurities come into play and sometimes they just get the best of you. I have had more doubt in the past 4 years about my life than any other time. I think it's a trying part of life to be in your twenties. I know many people go through this and as bad as that seems, there is comfort knowing that other people struggled and have come through this part of their life successfully. I know who I am supposed to be because God has told me. Things havent been working out and I am so impatient. I tried to take my life into my own hands to see if I could make it better. WHAT A MISTAKE!! I know I shouldn't have even tried but I am human and want instant gratification. Proverbs 16:9 says "a man's heart plans his ways but the Lord determins his steps." I know this verse like the back of my hand and what it means. Yet I still ignored God and took to my own ways. I got tired of living the "good girl" life and tried to live of the world hoping to find some clarity as to what my identity should be. Romans 12:12 " do not conform to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." Again, I know all this but tried I run the other way. I would t be surprised is God was yelling at me to come back because he knows I know better. But then again he is a gracious God and will never disown me. I have been pushing him away and I've gone further and further from Him. All it takes is one step back and I'm rigt back in his arms. That is he beauty of my forgiving and loving God. He will always take me back no matter what. My happiness is through Him and oh Him. He world cannot make me happy nor can any other person. My hope comes from the Lord and He is all I need!! I choose to be happy and full of Him. I choose to not worry or be bitter and unhappy about my life. I choose to live for Him and get back to what I know is right for me. I choose to be his daughter and love and seek to know him more. I choose to be me!